Closing out 2025
As I reflect on the closeout of 2025—a year of major activations—I can see how deeply this year stretched so many of us. 2025 was a hard year for many, pushing us to the very edges of our comfort zones. I started the year thriving with my two beloved pups, excited to see what was ahead. I hit the ground running, declaring Activation as the theme of the year… and wow, did I call in more than I realized. My soul must have known exactly what it was preparing me for, because activation certainly had its own master plan.
April and May marked the ignition of a profound shedding, both physical and energetic. I lost Porter in what felt like a very short span of time leading up to his crossing of the threshold—though looking back, I can see the signs as if some part of me already sensed it when the year began. It’s strange how it often doesn’t land until time has passed and you realize that a piece of your soul already knew what was coming. Losing him was an initiation into death itself—the loss of a soulmate whose connection with me runs deeply through lifetimes. One moment his presence was here; the next, it was gone. It felt like a phantom pain—knowing he was still near, yet unable to see him physically.
During his final 24 hours on earth, I learned the power of opening portals. I opened the portal two hours before he passed and kept it open for a full 24 hours after, sending him off with a heavy yet trusting goodbye—believing that he will return to my life again before my own time here is done. That portal offered his soul space to release his physical form, and gave me space to integrate the reality of his physical absence.
Not long after, I moved to the PNW to take a break from the magical yet mundane reality of Colorado—to heal my heart and be fully present with my grieving. I knew the rainy PNW would hold me in its darkness, and it became the place where my soul could retreat and sink deeply into grief—though, unknowingly, it eventually became too easy to disconnect entirely. The remainder of 2025 became a mini-series of activations—my soul stretching, growing, aching, and healing within the gloom. And through all of it, I learned what truly helps us through grief: Connection.
So in 2026, I will be returning to Colorado with a renewed vision of joy and connection. These were qualities I didn’t realize I had lost in 2025, in the midst of losing a precious relationship that mirrored a masculine aspect of my soul I feared was gone completely.
